i just read that the “pee your pants” thing started off as code for “kys” because suicide-baiting trolls were mad about being yelled at for suicide baiting, so now if you say “pee your pants” you’ll get people assuming you’re telling them something much worse
burn this website to the ground
i want to write a post putting this fucking garbage site on blast, but i’d probably just end up with an inbox full of teenagers telling me to kill myself
The thing about JRPGs is that you can’t really shitpost about them. No matter what mockery of the genre you come up with, there’s a very good chance it’s been done – unironically, even. Like, I could say “oh, yeah, that’s the one where giant babies from outer space show up and eat everybody at the end”, and not only is that not the most off-the-wall JRPG ending ever, it’s arguably not even the weirdest ending you can get in that particular game.
No, it’s true. I just finished one where the final boss was a triangle who tries to delete your save file
Always a classic.
And heck, even a lot of the more mainstream titles are pretty out there if you think about it.
Like the one where you beat Azathoth by praying to yourself.
Or the one where a shrine maiden’s imaginary boyfriend fights his giant monster dad.
Or the one where the fate of the world is decided by a duel to the death between a terminally ill fourteen-year-old girl and the actual
Frédéric Chopin.
What about the game where you commit suicide, and then fight a gun-lizard who serves as a metaphor for the cycle of violence?
Or the one where a baseball player and a talking cat fight over a light switch?
Or, getting more mainstream, the one where the final boss is a giant snowflake that embodies the collective negativity of everyone in the world. It’s not even sentient. It’s just a snowflake.
Look guys, I try to be sweet and gentle and patient here, I really do, but like I said earlier, my anxiety’s been just godawful lately. Plus, I’ve had to endure a lot of attacks – not directed at me, just general, but it’s still hurtful – because of some of my interests. Things like “people like that should just kill themselves”. So I’m kind of on edge lately. Just a little. Kind of at the point where I’m gonna Take No Shit from anyone.
british romanticism: i went into the woods and i found a beautiful woman, but she wasn’t really a woman, she was my Muse and the woods is my mind
american romanticism: i went into the woods and found the devil and he gave me a clock, but the clock was actually the industrial revolution and it fucking killed me
italian romanticism: i went into the woods and toppled face down over a root which proves nature is but a cruel stepmother, also this must somehow be a sign that God wants us to get rid of those fucking austrians
french romanticism: i went into the woods and found a peasant woman, but she wasn’t really a woman, she was the Republic and the woods is the people of France, wild, free and unconquered
polish romanticism: i didn’t go into the woods and i didn’t find any woman, we held a seance instead and summoned ghosts and listened to how they died, and then i was in a prison cell listening to my inmates while having existential crisis, but bottom line fuck Russia, Prussia and Austria
Spanish romanticism: I went into the woods and found a beautiful woman and we fell in love and married against her family’s wishes so of course I killed them all and so of course she left me to become a nun.
German romanticism: I went into the woods wearing a yellow vest and found a woman, who wouldn’t love me, and then I shot myself in the face.
i'm very gay. i'd like a few dollars. 