goodpokemonedits:

It’s time GameFreak stepped up and made a mature Pokémon game for mature adults like me. I don’t like cute pink things. That’s for girls. I want blood and violence. A sandcastle Pokémon? No thanks—the beach is for babies. Why not make a cool Pokémon like a gun dog or a truck eagle? Doesn’t GameFreak know that dark and cynical individuals like myself are the true fans? A teddy bear Pokémon? I’d rather cuddle a severed head. Give me blood and sex. Show me a boob Pokémon. My maturity necessitates it. When I saw Comfey for the first time I threw up. Flowers? Why not weed? I guess GameFreak is too scared to grow up and meet me at my level.