ah yes, here’s a subject line that makes me want to read your email

Me: I actually spent a good amount of time thinking about it. And I have come to the honest conclusion that I’d rather watch both Human Centipede movies than deal with any more political discussions.
Friend: ;n; You’re a martyr.
Me: Both make me lose faith in humanity, but in different ways.
Friend: One is a debase, horrific display of the worst traits of the human mind.
Friend: The other is a horror film.

yokai:

werreflectionz:

yokai:

good morning carly rae jepsen wherever you are

good morning i love u.

we are illuminati

? this is the scariest blog i’ve ever seen like what is their description oh my god

I was looking up mucinex side effects, and these excerpts from user reports read like a stream-of-consciousness poem from the point of view of someone who’s dying from a mucinex overdose.

Callout post for people who use the word ‘thot’

mettatonx:

disexplications:

argumate:

sadoeconomist:

Folks, I need to warn you

I’ve been seeing a sudden surge of use of the word ‘thot’ and I’m concerned

We’ve recently seen at least one ancient Egyptian deity resurrected through meme magic

Thoth is a significantly more powerful member of the pantheon than Kek and the consequences of summoning him may be even more drastic than the rebirth of Kek (Brexit, Trump winning the election, a series of celebrity deaths)

The phrase ‘return the bones thot’ radiates an obvious mystical power and it may herald that Thoth will come to preside over 2017 as Kek has presided over 2016 – the bones possibly refer to the millions of mummified ibises buried in his honor at his main temple in Khmun, by reblogging that post you may be unknowingly beseeching this ancient and powerful being to repay the thousands of years of sacrifices humanity once offered him – what form that might take, we can only speculate

Although it’s possible that Thoth has been with us for a while – his name in Greek letters is Θώθ, which is clearly referenced in the ‘OwO what’s this?’ meme

As the inventor of both magic and science and keeper of all wisdom, Thoth assuredly does know what ‘this’ is, but I’m not sure we want to find out

I’m also concerned that Thoth’s wife Ma’at may be connected to the frequent seemingly compulsive and superfluous use of the word ‘mate’ or ‘m8′ in memes

Please be careful with your memes, they may hold hidden arcane power

haha good one

*googles Θώθ*

oh bloody hell

Unlike Kek, a god of primordial darkness, Thoth is associated with balance, mediation, and arbitration. The return of Thoth may be exactly what we need in these troubled times

I think we’re forgetting another important Egyptian deity who’s apparently been pretty big this year. Her name is Nut.

throwback to either the best or worst white card i’ve ever played

computerworm:

computerworm:

mommyandherbabyprince:

A little cute argument me and mommy had before bedtime! I love her so much😊

if i talked like this to my mom i woulda got my ass beat

hold up

aestheticniallshat:

One day we’re gonna google the mandela effect and it’s gonna say “no results”