friskbitz
replied to your post “i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again. 4 out of every 5 problems…”
what’s the one that wouldn’t
being related to my dad and grandmother
Category: Uncategorized
Wake up sheeple
You squeeze lemons to make lemonade
How the FUCK do you think they make
Gatorade
OPEN YOUR FUCKING EYES
How come reading tea leaves is seen as this sophisticated, witchy thing but if I slam dunk an open can of Chef Boyardee ravioli onto the pavement in the gas station parking lot to see what kind of soda the old ones think I should buy, foodstuff divination suddenly isn’t cool anymore?
me, scratching the label off a GBA game with a butter knife: prepare yourselves for a new creepypasta, reddit
concept: woman makes deal with demon to have it’s child in exchange for eternal life or some shit
woman then makes deal with witch and offers her first born for like, riches or something
woman dumps demon baby on witch, absconds with her winnings and leaves witch and demon fighting for custody
half demon baby grows up learning magic and visiting hell on weekends and every second christmas
does the woman act as a sort of vodka aunt who shows up sometimes to teach the child how to work the system?
“here you go timmy, have a new xbox. this year I’m going to teach you the ins and outs of magical tax evasion”
SHE DOES NOW
i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again. 4 out of every 5 problems in my life would be solved by abandoning my meat body and becoming a robot.
ive tried opening my mouth and saying words before nd ive gotta say. im not a fan
there’s a post going around about mixing nyquil with 5 hour energy and I’m thinking about the time my parents were both out of town and my brother was in charge of dropping me off at school and I must’ve been 15 or 16 and I was really miserably sick so he gave me nyquil and but the time we were pulling up to the school I was crashing so his friend who was driving said ‘I have a redbull in the glove compartment” and they said “drink it and it’ll like even it out” so I did and I walked into school at 7:30 AM
and then immediately the last bell rang and school was over.
potion seller, I’m going into school and I need your STRONGEST dissociation
i'm very gay. i'd like a few dollars. 