vocaloids ranked based on how likely they are to suddenly appear in my kitchen at midnight and kill me

bikwin5:

1. Megurine Luka

Not a single night passes where I fear that Luka will be waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs in my house, ready to immediately destroy me in a single hit. My life will not know peace until I am certain I am safe from her terrifying power.

2. Megpoid Gumi

Gumi also holds an immense power similar to Luka’s. However she is more likely to appear in other rooms of the house (say, the living room) and can be temporarily willed out of existence if ignored for long enough. I swear I have witnessed her manifesting in my basement on at least one occasion.

3. Hatsune Miku

Miku is naturally attracted to corporate brand products, which my kitchen is full of. I could have sworn I saw her manifest next to the cupboard once, only to immediately disappear. She has the highest chance out of any vocaloid to appear in my kitchen, but has little to no desire to actually kill me. The greatest threat she poses is manifesting in the same place as me, killing me in a way not unlike telefragging in TF2.

4. Kagamine

Rin

Poses the smallest chance of ever appearing anywhere in my house, but poses a great threat if she happens to. May need to do some more research for the sake of reevaluating her ranking.

5. Kagamine

Len

Poses no threat, even on the off chance if he were to show up. I don’t know any other vocaloids so the list ends here.