monochromaticdishsponge:

lucineblue:

attractthecrows:

bpdgorl:

being emotionally abused has made me incredibly defensive towards being told what to do, but at the same time has made it hard for me to do things without someone telling me that it’s ok to do out if fear of doing something wrong and getting in trouble

You put it in words…

This is going to sound silly, but I’m gonna talk about what has worked for me in this case. Because lord knows I feel this thanks to the PTSD my abusive ex gave me.

If there’s something you want to do, that you’re feeling like you should, want, or need to do but feel that big mental, anxiety block making it hard for you to process?

Ask someone you trust to tell you it’s okay to do the thing you want/need to do.

Now I don’t mean, tell them to order you to do it, because that’ll make you go ‘Urgggh’ and do the mental rebellion thing, which is not what either of you want. How I like to do it is:

Me: Hey, I’m having a really rough time getting myself to eat something/relax/do this chore even though I want to; can you tell me it’s okay?

Friend: Sure! You can do the thing, it’s okay! I believe in you!

What I found for me is it takes the mental pressure off of me to be ‘incharge’, while I still get the thing I need to do, done. I’m still taking action in the end, but the ‘responsibility’ is lent to the friend temporarily. 

It’s not a sign of weakness to ask for help like this; it’s a sign you understand yourself enough to know when you might need that extra push. Of course, you may need to explain it to your friend, and it’s good to have a few friends who know this in case one isn’t around, so you don’t depend on one person entirely.

I don’t know if this would work for everyone, but it’s definitely helped me when I’ve had bad days. Look after yourselves, okay? You deserve to be happy, too!

You post these and it helps